The do’s and don’ts of a college hook-up


With classes back in session and the campus abuzz with new and old faces, many of us may have one lingering question on our minds: Who is that hot guy/girl that I see every day in RoMo’s and when can we make a memory or two of our own?  As we all know college is the time to experiment and find ourselves, both in and out of the bedroom. There is no shame in a one-night stand every now and again, 
so long as the proper steps are taken.

Sex is an essential part of life, and let’s be honest here, it can be quite rewarding. From makeup sex to making love, and everything in between, we as humans have an innate desire to experience ‘pleasure,’ be it by ourselves or with others. Now that we’re away from our parents and families, we are entering a unique chapter of our lives: the exciting journey of finding ourselves. While we are here in college to get an education in the hopes of securing that prestigious job we have wanted for so long, that does not mean that we shouldn’t have a little ‘fun’ along the way. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this is where this piece gets interesting, and I will advise, that if you are uncomfortable or unwilling to entertaining the notion of taking care of one of our most primal and, sometimes, uncontrollable urges to ‘do it,’ then please promptly close out of this page. For all of you other brave souls that want to see just how far the rabbit hole goes, hold on tight.

‘Hooking up’ is a phrase that has been used more and more in recent years, and with the concept of ‘friends with benefits’ (a topic I will be addressing at a later time),  having sex has become programmed into our minds.

Now you may be thinking, “Based on the title of this article, is there really a wrong way to hook-up?” That answer, my fellow sex-craved classmates, is absolutely! Just like riding a bike, tying a shoe, or writing a paper, certain unwritten rules exist and should at all times be followed. A code of screwing around, if you will. So, without further delay, I present to you, “The Dos and Don’ts of a college hook-up:

Do’s:

Do: Use protection and at least one other form of birth control! Yes, even in 2013, I still feel the need to stress the importance of using a condom for personal and public health safety. A hook-up is supposed to be a fun and enjoyable time, and the last thing that is wanted is an unplanned pregnancy or a vast array of STI’s.

Do: Allow yourself to have fun! This is one of the most important components of a proper hook-up. If we allow ourselves to think that what we are doing is wrong or disgusting, than all we will be left with but a sense of overwhelming guilt, and no one wants to ruin a perfectly good “O” with a bunch of silly head games.

Do: Be vocal in what you like and hate. This moment is about both parties enjoying themselves; let each other know what gets you turned on and what does nothing for you. Don’t worry about coming off as too blunt or demanding; chances are that your hook-up will be a one time thing and it really doesn’t matter what the other thinks afterwards.

Do: Establish ground rules for during and after the sexual encounter. It is crucial that both parties are consenting and on the same page, as relying on nonverbal cues may have serious ramifications in the long run.

Don’ts:

Don’t: Clinginess is the fastest way to ruin a good thing. This, right here, is where many people turn their hookup into a case of mad stalking. As stated above, hooking up is designed to be a fun and attachment free way to ‘hit it and quit it;’ one hundred percent sex and zero percent drama.

Don’t: Wait by the phone for a phone call after the rendezvous. Most of the time, simply put, the other person is not interested in anything other than a good time. Therefore, in case an inference cannot clearly be made, THEY DO NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP! Enjoy your time, however brief, and move on. Do not let emotions get in the way.

Don’t: While in bed, using pet names with a hookup is, again, a major no. Stick to first names, or, better yet, don’t use names at all. Calling the other ‘babe, baby, boo, papi,’ or any other awkward choice will in fact, also kill the mood and make the other person think you are a little creepy.

Don’t: Finally, the point of a hook up is to have amazing sex without others knowing; case in point, if you are going to sleep around, don’t run your mouth. Regardless of if you’re promiscuous or not, the last thing anyone needs is to be labeled as is the campus slut.